it was bound to happen

and it did.

ellroy.

a cigar.

a good cigar.

$10.99 cigar.

celebration of sorts.

a little splurge. and i was planning on puff puff puffing away as i wrote tonight.

but little ole' ellroy somehow managed to chomp the goddamn thing.

my $10.99 arturo fuente grand reserva cigar.

trying to smoke it as we speak.

this mangled piece of tobacco.

terrible.

-- frayed and split and looking like an orangutan's penis.

can barely pull smoke.

matter of fact the goddamn thing is basically a fat stick of incense.

tobaccy incense.

smells good enough, i guess.

pepper;

cedar;

and leather.

yeah...leather.

alas, christoff of yesteryear woulda smacked the shit outa ellroy.

there was that second or two where i contemplated knocking him around,

but i just couldn't.

so damn little. so damn vulnerable. me this big galoot.

i yelled though.

loud and angry and little 'ole ellroy looked up @ me.

kid had no clue.

probably wanted to play fetch with it.

"BAD BOY!," i said.

"BAD BOY!"

grabbed him kinda rough, could tell ellroy knew something wasn't kosher.

the jig was up.

put him in the kennel.

shut the lights.

and now little 'ole ellroy's sitting in the dark,

and my ass is sucking away @ this dominican stoogie.

barely pulling smoke.

looking like one of them exploding cigars meant for castro.

hell, it coulda killed him.

ellroy, that is.

but it's been about an hour.

in the dark.

alone.

and ellroy hasn't said a peep.

checked up on him -- he's curled up.

i looked real hard,

and he averted his eyes.

ashamed maybe?

guilty?

scared?

i dunno.

but it was bound to happen.

and it did.