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caution graphic scenes of my dinneri bought two chickens. a "rhode island red," and a white-breasted "leghorn." i figured it was about time. chickens. i mean, they shit eggs.
well, at least one of them did, the "rhode island red." the "leghorn" was a frying chicken. plus i liked the "rhode island," she didn't scratch up my lawn like the "leghorn," and i just re-seeded my lawn. we(my cousin and i) went about processing the bird.
we wrangled up a chopping block (4"x4") and gave the
"leghorn," some fresh fruit. she liked that. then
i set her on the block. very gently. stroked her little back and before she knew it, her little chicken head was plopped off by my "Cold Steel" kukri. now let me re-enforce something: there was NO animal cruelty going on here. just a good old fashioned fresh chicken dinner. free of hormones. free of disease (hopefully), and open range.
after the head was cut off, i strung her up from my shed, drained the blood (about a cup full), then brought a pot of water to a boil. dipping the bird for several minutes. retrieved her and went about dressing her.
fairly easy work. rip. rip. rip. feathers just slip off. then i inserted my k-bar fighting knife into the gut and cut out the innards. what a sight. and to think, we kinda look like this too. complicated beings my friend. take a moment to reflect.
yes, that's nice...
so the bird is gutted and scrubbed. cut up some taters and an apple. shove the aforementioned accoutrement's up its butt. drizzle some extra virgin olive oil. a shake of garlic salt. insert into 350degree oven for an hour and a half.
it sizzled and browned and smelled rather delicious. mouth-watering even. scrumptious. heavenly.
unfortunately it tasted like a used tampon. but we had catsup.
lots of catsup.
99cent store catsup.
2 comments:
damn dude, i eat plenty of chicken but i've never bought my own and chopped its head off. you're a marine. that explains it;) looks like it was delicious. thanks for stopping by my blog. hope you come visit again! i actually have never had pizza in little italy, us locals tend to stear away from little italy -it's kind of a tourist trap. next closest? lombardi's on spring.
Hillarious. I knew you were going to cook the bird, but to blog the process? Brilliant. The photos look like they were straight out of Abu Ghraib.
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